In starting the New Year fresh with an upcoming list of essays about Beards and Unnecessary Friend Requests and men who think Brazilian Bikini Waxes are hot, I’m suddenly finding it imperative that I share The Rules. Really it’s because I’ve spent all week reflecting on how this project has been going, where I want it to end up, and what I need to change. It’s become clear that out of the 5 Rules I set for myself before launching - I’ve broken all of them. Every single one. I’m not mad about it. This is a young website. Like everything I’ve ever made nothing started off with all the kinks already worked out. That shit takes time. But I have never created anything of value without taking the necessary pauses to step back and find holes, revisit the thesis, see if anything needs editing, reshaping, or to be swiped all together.
Nothing’s getting swiped. Or edited. We’re good. Plenty of dicks and tits and heartbreak and soul-crushing and daddy issues and black scorpions coming your way. We are all set. But it’s good practice to have rules. This isn’t anarchy. It’s a controlled project that I work on daily to conform to a set of parameters no matter how boundless they may seem in order to create a desired effect. It’s Art motherfuckers.
However I’ve got to regulate a few things for safety’s sake so…
THE RULES OF ELEGANT HUSTLER
1. Protect everyone’s privacy. No names, pictures, or any identifying information. This is so obvious it doesn’t need any discussion. No one should have to be connected to me or a story or any place on the internet against their will. Or, on some occasions, when they ask to be. Anonymity rules.
2. Protect my own privacy. Though my Website Rule is to hold nothing back, there is a huge difference between my private life and the personal life that I write about. My name, description, images, tits, face, sure. OF COURSE. Pictures of the inside of my apartment or my dog? No. Information on where this may be? Definitely no. Having to write anecdotes and throw color into stories is necessary, describing a day or mundane details sometimes helps to bring the reader in - but location is off limits. Knowing my home life - leave it out.
3. I am not sending messages. Though anonymity is the most crucial rule to adhere to because of legality issues and well - kindness - this is arguably the one I have to be the most aware of. This is also the most important rule to share with my readers. Because hey guys - I am not sending you messages. I don’t know who you are. And I don’t really care. I want you to be invisible. That’s the only way this will work. Though I’m writing about people with whom I’m connected it’s still a professional endeavor. If I used it to further an agenda the writing would be inauthentic and read like shit. And if I wanted something from those people I’d email their asses and tell them myself. There is a clear division between what I am writing and how I communicate personally. This is not a Social Media Profile, or a Live Journal, or a Group Email. It’s Art Motherfuckers!!
4. Don’t respond to comments. Though I haven’t really had much of a vocal reaction, this rule is reserved for when I start working to reach a wider audience, it still applies small scale. I write A LOT. With A LOT of fucking opinions. Comment sections are for commentators, not for the artist. Have at it. I’m not getting involved. I have one prewritten response if anyone should ever use the word slut or the like that is just to be copied and pasted each time. That’s it. It’s the internet. Go to town.
5. Do not date men who have read this before I’ve shared it. OK. This was the first rule that I made. I mean it's common sense. Whether he thinks he has to fuck me a certain way and it goes horribly wrong, or he wants to prove something and that also goes horribly wrong, or he thinks we’re BFFs because he’s learned so much about me which ALSO goes horribly wrong. It gives any man such an unfair advantage, and like most, he's going to use that power improperly and fuck it all up anyway. Again, I am writing about my personal life to a public audience, but I need to keep my private life fucking private.
So there are the 5 Hustler Rules. I have broken each once, slightly bruised the integrity of this site, then went well on my way. As I continue posting and you continue to read maybe it’s fair to keep this guide in mind so that we can all go about our business safely and with peace of mind. And of course as with anything so fluid, if my thesis or goals or objectives change over time and I have to make a new list of rules or take some out all together well then maybe I just will. I can. You know why? Because this is my project, my site, and a whole lotta writing that I spend all my time and effort working on. And it’s Art Motherfuckers!!